The Six "Be's"- Gordon B. Hinckley

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

picky eaters

I'm in need of some help in dealing with a "picky eater". I don't know where this pickiness came from, and I don't know how to help Bryce over come it. I know all little kids go through stages of being picky eaters, not wanting to eat and then they want to eat everything. We're in the stage of being a picky eater. Is this something he'll out grow? He doesn't want to eat anything and I'll make things I know he likes. Too, he all the sudden doesn't want to eat when we eat. We explain to him it's meal time and time to eat and that he won't be able to eat until the next meal time. (of course he'll come to crying that he's hungry and I'll get him something little so that he will eat the next and I"ll explain that whole meal time again). We've even tried bribing him with desert if he'll eat. If he doesn't eat at meal time, he'll also come crying to me that his tummy hurts-which means he's hungry. I don't know how all the sudden we got out of the "eating normal" phase and into this. I don't know what to do and I'm hoping that some of you moms have dwelt with this and can help me.

9 comments:

Amy said...

I've had to deal with this with both my girls, but especially Lily. I don't know if my advice will help, but I'll try to share what I've learned. First of all, there are some kids who will eventually eat a certain food if they get hungry enough. But, there are other kids who will not give in. No matter how hungry they get. Lily is one of those kids. I have learned to try not to have a power struggle with her. If I keep offering a certain food that she doesn't like, along with something she does, she has eventually (this took years with some foods) decide to give the new food a try. It had to be on her terms though. Another thing I've learned is that if you tell them that this is their meal and if they don't eat it then they won't have anything till the next meal, you have to stick with that. They will learn really quick that you don't really mean it if you give in later to them. Skipping one meal (for a healthy child) will not hurt anything, so no matter how guilty they try to make you feel, you have to stick to your initial consequence. Toddlers are notorious for eating so little some times that you wonder how they stay alive. One thing that I did with my girls when I didn't think they were eating that well was to give them a vitamin. It made me feel better. I think that children are pretty good at knowing what their bodies need. If you keep track of what they eat for a month, you will probably find that they are actually eating a variety of things over time. They may go for days hardly eating more than a few bites of anything, and then they will have days where they are eating everything in sight. Of course, if you have a child with sensory issues (like Lily) it can be a little trickier. I think the most important thing is to continually offer the new food in conjunction with a familiar food and then try not to worry too much if they aren't interested in the new food for awhile. I know how frustrating this process can be, though. If it helps, at least you know you're not alone.

Mary said...

When I was watching kids in our home the past few years I had to deal with what I think was the pickiest eater in the world, Tye. For a long time I couldn't get him to eat anything but chicken nuggets, crackers, mac n cheese, and cereal.

I did some of the exact same things Amy's talking about. Just keep giving them the food you fix and sit them in their chair for meal time. Maybe give them a little longer at the table. Do what you are doing and explain what meal time is and they won't be get anything else till next time. And STICK TO IT! That's the most important because if you don't they quickly learn that what you tell them doesn't go.
Amy's also right don't feel bad, after one or two skipped meals your kids will learn they better eat when it's meal time or they'll be hungry later.
Also, keep your meals at a scheduled time so everyone knows when it'd time to eat.
I hope that helps. Good Luck!

Katie said...

Amy, I"m going to have to talk to you, because Bryce seems to be like Lilly was with food. He has a lot of sensitivity to foods (all the allergy tests that were done came back negative), but I know there's something that's not right. And he was also diagnosed with what's called Toddler's Diarrhea, which doesn't help the situation any. It's hard to get him to try new food, because of his sensitivity. What you've gone through is exactly what I'm dealing with now. Now I feel a lot more hopeful.

I appreciate what you guys both said, because some things you guys mentioned we're doing and it makes me feel more hopeful knowing that I just need to stick to my guns and not give in to "feeling bad".

Allison @ House of Hepworths said...

I asked the kids Pedi once about this and he told me that kids eat what their body needs including the proteins and carbs and vitamins etc. He told me, let them just eat whatever they want - within reason. If they want PB&J 3x a day for an entire month, don't worry about it. Their body will tell them what they need.

Amy said...

Katie, just give me a call anytime. Alisa's got my # or you can email me and I'll give it to you. Of course, if you'd rather converse through email, that's fine too. I don't know how much I can help, but I can certainly try.

Gooches said...

i know it is really hard to let them go to bed hungry, but i asked my pediatrician about it and he said that if they will not eat when you eat then the CANNOT eat again until the next meal. i totally threaten my kids with this and then never fall through...until recently! it totally works. spence went to bed once without eating and the problem went away. it is hard but i realized my kids are not going to die from not eating one meal.

Alisa said...

All of you guys are so smart...are you all moms or something?!? Along with what everyone else said, my pedi said that they DEFINITELY will not starve to death missing one meal, and don't look at their intake on a daily basis, but rather a weekly basis. Right now I am super lucky with Tye (he ate celery and peanut butter last night and LOVED it!). But, I have no idea how long that will last. Also, you really need to buy that probiotic powder. That will help if not eliminate the diarrhea all together. If he will eat yogurt, that has the same live bacteria that if eaten consistently will eliminate diarrhea. (Just like the rota virus vaccine.) Tye didn't have diarrhea until he was on an antibiotic a couple of months ago, but we fed him yogurt every day for a long time, and gave him the powder occasionally after that. But, he generally doesn't deal with stomach issues. Hope to see you this weekend!

Walker family said...

Katie, after reading everyones comments, I had another thought. Keep your standards low...with Ty if he would at least try the food by taking one bite and then was still was not keen on eating it I said it was o.k. I would consider that a win.

I was told that getting your toddler to eat one good meal a day was the most to expect from their appetites. Even that is difficult to accomplish sometimes.

Katie said...

Thank you everyone for what you've all said. I feel so much better knowing that I'm not the only one who's dwelt with this or is going through this. I guess my problem is I freak out a little more because of all the health issues Bryce has had. Knowing things have worked for guys makes me feel even better for trying these things out. Thank you to everyone!
Amy-I'll get your number from Alisa
Alisa-When are you guys coming up? Please call me and let me because I'd love to see you!